Wednesday, October 4, 2017

Meriting Celestial Realms

As I've said before I don't necessarily have experiential knowledge of karma unless the devastating psychosis I experienced in 2006 counts as karma for fucking with Buddhism.  Just prior to that episode I wrote a kind of fable in which I tried to take down the Buddhist claim that there was no self.  I said, "Do you believe one is one's own refuge?"  Is one one's own?  Is one not one's own?  I ended up with four statements: I am a self but I am not my own.  I am no self but I am my own.  ( This last statement follows if the person says he is not a self but he is his own refuge.)  And by extension, I said: I am a self, but my self is found in others.  I am no self, but I am inhabited by others. 

What followed was a spiritual head-reaming.  Maybe that was negative karma.  But what about all the shit I went through in high school?  Did those people suffer their negative karma?  The evidence for this concept seems inconsistent at best.  People do get away with murder.  Just look at Detroit.  Nevertheless, in absence of concrete proof one way or the other, I live in hopes of meriting celestial realms.  I live in hopes of justice, maybe even mercy.

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